Yesterday was weird and I got all moody and sensitive and stuff. I think it's because I'm PMSing. That may be the reason for this semi-rant thing ahead.
My sister Paulina is a dancer. She loves it, she has a passion for it. But yesterday, my mom and I went with her to Kohl's because she wanted to buy a body shaping thing to go under her dance costume because she thinks she looks fat in it.
There are many awful things that come with being a teenager, but one really bad thing an almost fifteen-year-old girl can experience is thinking she is fat. I know, I've gone through that. I still go through that sometimes, but thankfully, now that I'm older, I know that A) I'm not fat, even if I feel like it sometimes, and B) Even if I were, it's not the worst thing one can be.
There are many people I can "blame" for brainwashing my sister and I into thinking that if we're not skinny, we're not good enough: the media, society, even my mother and grandmother. But I don't want to blame anyone, because there's nothing we can do about it now. I just know that it's possible and NORMAL to believe otherwise. It takes time and support from others, but I just know that now that I like who I am, life is so much more meaningful. This actually means a lot, coming from me, the girl that used to have a billion insecurities.
Anyway, there I was in a Kohl's fitting room with Paulina, and there she was, nearly crying because the damn thing was so expensive but she absolutely needed it or else she was going to look horrible. -__- So, yeah, the body shaper wasn't a huge deal, it was just for one time. But Paulina complains all the time about how fat she is, going on diets and stuff. It breaks my heart.
I had a moment there in the fitting room, I saw my younger self in her, and I felt her pain. It was so frustrating to see my beautiful, talented, loud and funny little sister looking at herself like that. I wish I could tell her how awesome she is and have her believe me.
But, being who she is, I tried to comfort her and she gave me a look. An I'm-going-to-beat-you-up-if-you-don't-snap-out-of-it look. So that was that. ._. One day she'll believe me, I know it.
Gah, I'm too mushy. Here's a picture of me and Luna to negate the mushiness.
