TL;DR. Ye be Warned

I am so tied to my computer. It's an addiction, it really is. I'm thinking of restricting my internet usage a lot for the next year; A resolution, if you will.

It became clear to me this past week, when we were starting our final project in my drawing class. I had so much trouble coming up with an idea. (As whined about in this post) All I could think about was, "The internet will save me! The internet will give me ideas!" instead of coming up with ideas on my own. It's like I've become lazy when I have to be creative. Like I have no mind of my own. Instead of thinking something up myself, I check online to see what other people have come up with.

It explains the serious lack of writing, the major writer's block I have, and the artist's block. Another thing that sucks up any creativity I may have is mindless browsing. There is really no need for me to check my facebook and email more than twice a day, really. And yet, I spend my time on the internet clicking on yahoo and facebook and youtube over and over and over again, as if I expect something to change.

It's also been affecting my concentration. I never, ever have only one tab open. (even now. I'm typing this up and watching Fire and Ice on youtube.) If I ever, do, I quickly open a new one, because it feels like I should save time by multitasking. Now, I notice that even when I'm doing something not computer-related, I have to be doing something else too, just to save time. When I'm doing that, I don't fully concentrate on either thing.

Another thing that's bee a problem with me lately is spending way too much time watching TV shows. I feel like I'm watching too many at a time, ad I can't even keep track of what happened in which show. I swear, right now I am watching Battlestar Galactica, Clannad After Story, Mushi-Shi, Last Exile, X-Files, Avatar The Last Airbender, Doctor Who, and Firefly (the last three for the second time). Lost and Doctor Who alone have cost me most of my year. Now, I'm a lover of a good story, so I am definitely not cutting out TV shows altogether, but I am going to limit how many I am allowed to watch at one time (probably two is all I can handle).

Now, I don't want this post to be just about the things I am going to cut out, but also what I am going to focus on this year. Reading, for one. I miss the feeling of getting sucked in to a story to the point of not being able to put it down, to the point that I cry at a character's loss and cheer at their successes. I have not gotten to that point in hardly any book that I've read this year, because of my internet-an-tv-fueled ADD. I've read a fair few books, but too sporadically. So a focus on reading for next year.

Playing video games may come as a surprising thing to focus on, but it is something that I have too long abandoned. I am talking specifically about Final Fantasy X and X-2. I miss the satisfaction of leveling up and defeating bosses. It is something that required quite a bit of dedication. I am one to replay old games like Spyro the Dragon and Jak 2 and Shadow of the Colossus over and over, never moving on to new games. So, finishing FFX and X-2, and trying out new games. Skyrim and KOTOR are on the top of the list.

Writing and art are, obviously, a huge thing I want to focus on. I still have to many characters in my head whom are begging to have their stories told, and I will not let them turn to dust. I have too many dreams that should have been drawn and made real, but have sadly wasted away in a brain that goes in a million different directions and has no time to concentrate on anything. I need a little bit of discipline.

Also, blogging. I still like blogging, because if feels like a grown up version of journaling, but I need to update less when I have nothing to say. I think I have one too many posts that just say LOL NOTHING'S HAPPENED BUT I FEEL LIKE POSTING MY FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS ANYWAY. No more. (I still may need to vent sometimes, but that's different.)

In conclusion (I know, finally) I really want to discipline myself, to learn to concentrate, to multitask less, and to finish more. Turn off the TV, turn on the music. Close the laptop, open a book. Yeah, that sounds good. It's my new mantra. And screw waiting until January. I'm starting now. :D I feel very motivated.

Listening to Epica. Epica is God.

My hair is very insane today. All I did was scrunch it, and this is how different it looks!

Which is weird, because usually all I do is... not scrunch it. Never thought scrunching was so powerful.

Don't like my fringe area though. The hairs are annoyingly short and thus they frizz the most. Oh and apparently, all of the red from my last dye job has faded to a sad brown. I must re-dye soon.

HAIR, Y U NO BUTT-LENGTH ALREADY?

I am cleaning my room, listening to E-Type (Free Like A Flying Demon- good song), looking forward to a hot chocolate later and maybe a couple hours of playing my old Jak 2 game. I have nothing to complain about.

:D

I'm oddly happy despite a hefty art final that I have to do and mom's chemo tomorrow. I'm not complaining at all, this is a very nice mood I'm in.

Here's a random picture of me I just found, lookin like an elf. :P I am a weirdo.

Playing with the big boys now

Gyuuuuh! The Lost ending was... well... good. Not perfect, but hell, if I was the one writing this show, I wouldn't have thought of a better way to end it besides **SPOILERS** killing everyone. I may have shed a tear, there were a lot of touching moments. But anyway, as much as I enjoyed this show, I am glad it's over. There are tons of other shows out there I need to watch.


Sayid by *ObsessedGirl on deviantART

I'm thinking of starting on Battlestar Galactica. I've heard it's good.

I read some old journals of mine. Damn, I was a messed up, violent kid. Explains why I'm a messed up teenager/young adult. I'm a lot less ashamed of myself, though. I know what I am and I'm not afraid to show it. As much as reading the old notebooks made me go "Whut." they also made me proud at how far I've come.

COMPUTER MASCHINE PANZERMENSCH

Freshly dyed hair... *sniffs it* Still smells like harsh chemicals. *Looks at it in the mirror* And it's still not red enough. I'm slowly building up to my ideal color. Mind you, my natural color is black, so at least this is something.

I'm, like, an episode away from the finale of Lost. Now they killed Sayid, and Sun and Jin, those damn writers. They offed all my favorite characters. I haven't been this annoyed since they killed off Ana Lucia.

Back hurts, I think I pulled a muscle while moving furniture around my room. It's nothing too bad, but it's annoying.

My cousins from Guadalajara are coming to visit this Friday and staying for Thanksgiving. I am happy, I miss them. :)

I have a feeling I'm going to wake up with a red-stained pillowcase tomorrow morning.

This made me laugh a lot. I'm going to try it with Luna. :P

Listening to the Prince of Egypt soundtrack

Looks like my brain is just trolling me. This night I dreamed I bought a delicious strawberry-banana smoothie at the mall, and a crazy lady came up to me and asked, "Can I have a sip? I want to know if it's worth my money..."
I stared for about two seconds and then yelled, "NO YOU CANNOT HAVE A SIP. WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU? I DON'T WANT YOUR HERPES."
My exact words. So, yeah, kinda funny, but not as good as yesterday's dream.

Paulina, my dad, and I are all going to L.A. on Friday on account that my mom is having a huge all-weekend slumber party with some of her friends from university. O.o So yeah, there won't be any room for us in the house. I ain't complaining though, cause Pau and I are going to Disneyland on Saturday!! Pretty excited!

I thought there was something else I wanted to add, but... for the life of me, I cannot remember what it was. It must not have been important.

Listening to new Evanescence CD. Amy Lee's voice is possibly my favorite of all voices. Possibly.

So. I really want to use this gif for something:




Maybe once I get my license, and again when I get a job. :) Speaking of which, guy at Best Buy said that applying online is best. So I shall do that. *Doing it now.* *nervous again*

THE NEW EVENESCENCE CD IS MINE!

I also bought a controller for my laptop. Cause computer games are fun, but using the keyboard sucks.


Oh, that's right, I had a list of things I had to do this week. ^^; I'm going to give myself the weekend to finish it. Yeah.

Um. I'm off to write or draw or something.

Listening to said New Age CD

Okay, I see now why I thought that CD was full of Egyptian music:

Totally Egyptian

Seriously though, my mom got this pirated CD in Mexico sometime in the late nineties, and there are some serious spelling errors on it. Meat Lofft? Green Slaves? (Meat Loaf and Greensleeves. lol) And the art on it is a seriously bad photoshop job. You gotta give us Mexicans credit though. They could have left the whole thing blank and just sharpied the song names in. (I seriously said serious to many times in this paragraph. Seriously.)

The days are starting to cool down, and I'm kind of happy about it. It means layers, and scarves and boots and stuff. :D Oooh, and hot chocolate. 

Heehee. I slept with socks on last night, something I don't usually like to do.

Eh, I'm off to work out. It'd be nice to have some muscle, you know? Also, Paulina has been teaching me how to bellydance, I'm off to practice. ;P

Tons of quizzes

I am multitasking right now. I'm drawing, downloading songs and organizing my itunes in general, and taking quizzes.

Your Brain is 47% Female, 53% Male

Your brain is a healthy mix of male and female You are both sensitive and savvy Rational and reasonable, you tend to keep level headed But you also tend to wear your heart on your sleeve

What Gender Is Your Brain?

Blogthings: Discover the Parts of Your Personality that Have Been Hiding

Huh, interesting. I kind of already knew I had a male mind as I tend to think in a more pervy way than girls. I giggle at sex jokes. Sue me.

Your Brown Eyes Say You're Clever and Witty

You are seen as brilliant and irreverent. You speak your mind, and people love you for it. You don't let other people see any insecurities you might have. You like to present a brave front. You are sharp as a tack and very quick on your feet. You're the first to get or tell a joke. You are also clear thinking in a crisis. You are an excellent problem solver.

What Does Your Eye Color Say About You?

Blogthings: Waste Time at Work!

Yay clever and witty! I will take it! This is actually pretty accurate.

You Are From Neptune

You are dreamy and mystical, with a natural psychic ability. You love music, poetry, dance, and (most of all) the open sea. Your soul is filled with possibilities, and your heart overflows with compassion. You can be in a room full of friendly people and feel all alone. If you don't get carried away with one idea, your spiritual nature will see you through anything.

What Planet Are You From?

Blogthings: Cheaper Than a Therapist

Nice, and pretty true, except I don't like the sea quite that much. I prefer a lovely mountain foresty place with a river running through it. Ahh, bliss.

You Attract a Cancer

When sensitive, needy, emotional Cancer meet you, they've met your match. You can nurture a Cancer and take things as slowly as is needed. You are careful with your Cancer. You try not to ever say or do anything upsetting. You're willing to walk on eggshells. It's worth it for your Cancer's devotion.

What Sign Do You Attract?

Blogthings: We Have a Quiz for Almost Everything

Needy Cancer? Walking on eggshells? No thanks. I'm honest to the point of brutality, so I would probably make a Cancer cry.

Well, this was fun.

Yerushalayim shel zahav

Went out of town, haven't written in a while. It was my grandma's 78th birthday. I gave her this angel drawing and she liked it. :)



Angel by ~Dannygirl123 on deviantART


Too tired to write any more.

Dani? Oh yeah, she's an Egyptologist.

So... what's happened? Hm, I did my laundry! Yeah, nothing's happened. Except I watched The Prince of Egypt yesterday, and I realized that I really want to be an Egyptologist. Or an archaeologist. That would be incredible. :D

I really want some adventure in my life. Egyptology seems perfect for me because it's something I've always loved since I was young. I remember this one pop-up book on mummification I had. I would write "reasearch papers" on it (basically copying down all of the text of the book). It was so fun. Also, I loved playing out The Mummy (the movie, you know, with Brendan Fraser) with my barbies. My childhood friend Kaitlin might remember this. I would play my mom's new age CD and would pretend it was ancient Egyptian music. (I realize now that most of the songs were in Latin and some in French.)

There was something magical about that CD though:

Wearing my very cool Doctor Who shirt. :D

Whoo. Getting back into a productive routine is weird after being shut up in my room reading for almost three days straight. I looked out the window and hissed at the morning. Heh, well, I'm painting now, so, no long-term harm done. ;)

Lol at my mom, though. She signed up for one of those fake-ass get rich quick things you see advertised all over the internet. I told her it was probably fake, and she had to call this number to cancel her account. My mom doesn't think it's funny, but I think it's hilarious.

My mom had the idea to tutor kids who needed extra help with math and stuff a while back, and I told her that she should get started by signing up for a tutoring agency online and advertising, and she did! :)

Listening to this while I work:



Also, no surprise that Peter Dinklage won an Emmy. He's awesome.

Listening to Within Temptation - The Howling

I went driving with my dad today. Plenty of driving. I'm not so scared of it anymore. I used to have, like, mini panic attacks every time I sat in the driver's seat. Of course, I still avoid the highways and I still have slight issued with full parking lots, but I am so much more at ease. :D I'm so brave, you guys!!1!!1

MY DREAMS ARE TORTURING ME WITH AWESOMENESS. I was a zombie slayer last night. Yeeah, I had a very cool rifle, and I shot those motherfuckers down! I was on some creepy island, Lost-esque, and I was all cool and in control. There were some other people with me, and they all listened to me like I was the leader. "Don't worry, we'll get through this night."
...Shut up, it was a good dream. The bad thing about those dreams is that I wake up and think, shit, why can't I really be like that?

But whatevs. I'm eating a baby bottle pop. And I'm wearing a temporary tattoo.

Listening to Delerium - Fallen

So... henna kind of sucks at covering up patches of hair that have been bleached into oblivion. -__- I had to buy hair dye at Target. Dark Auburn. It turned out really nice! Except for my roots, which I hope will fade a little. I don't have a picture, but I hope I will tomorrow.

Anyway, short post. I have a few things to do right now. Like, paint. And watch Game of Thrones or something.

I finally finished watching all five seasons of Doctor Who

Yesterday afternoon, I:

Bleached my hair to an ungodly ass-blonde color.

It looks ugly now, but I'm going to henna it tomorrow and there will be pretty redness in my hair.

Today afternoon, I:

Went to the movies with my dad and sister. We went to see The Art of Getting By. My god, what a bore. Freddie Highmore played an interesting character, but I was really indifferent about it otherwise.

Ate at Pei Wei. Dan Dan Noodles were good, but Paulina's Pad Thai was better. Mmm. There was one of these incredibly cool soda machines there:



Aww yeah.

Just a few minutes ago, I:

Cleaned this shit off my bed.

While wearing my Rose Tyler pants (which I should probably call Rose Tyler sweats, because I believe "pants" is synonymous to "knickers" in the UK . lol who cares I ain't even British.)

While wearing this lipstick, for no reason other than WHY THE HELL NOT:

While my ghetto-colored hurr is in this messy style:

While listening to this:

The end.

Weekend in Los Angeles

I had a lovely weekend. The Getty was fun. There was an exhibition on art and furniture and clothes of 18th century France. It was really beautiful, and really extravagant. It was a very over-the-top era, but it was really pretty. My favorite piece was an old harpsichord. *.* I wanted to play it really bad! It makes such pretty sounds. Here's some  lovely harpsichord music:





LA is so diverse, it's seriously the best place to go people-watching. Many people from many different races and different subcultures.

My mom bought me this very cool sketchbook/notebook thing as a graduation present.

I already drew a little something in it:

It's a bad quality picture, but yeah. 

Oh, and I've started reading A Great and Terrible Beauty. Again. Because I love that book.

OwCramps

Today I am experiencing some of the worst cramps I've had in years. Complete with nausea. Oh my god, It's awful. I took Tylenol and nothing, so my mom gave me some stronger stuff, and it's only just taken the edge off.

I'm watching Labyrinth, though, so I'm okay.

Here's a pretty song that I love. <3

The Totoro song is stuck in my head

Do you know what today is? It was the day of my last final. Which means, HIGH SCHOOL IS HISTORY! HAHAHAAHAHA!

Great holy beard of Zeus, it feels awesome.

Here are a few pictures of what's been going on these past few days.

Okay, so I am like, one boss away from beating the game. :D I'm excited.

Bad quality picture of a little something I'm painting.

My sister painted little Totoros on my nails. ^.^ So cute! I especially love little cyclops on my ring finger.

Weird, I don't remember taking this picture. But here it is anyway.

Totoro, Totoro!

OREO YUM

So, I ended up not going to the concert thing. My sister took another friend instead, and I'm glad she did because her friend is going to enjoy it a lot more than me. So... yay? Now it's a plain old Friday, which isn't so bad.

Er... I like oreos.